"Put the Kid in Time-out!"

 I just realized how selfish  I truly am. I mean, I ain't gonna front, I been knew I was selfish but I didn't know it was to this extreme and I definitely didn't understand why, until recently. Time. Time is unlimited but the amount I have is. As valuable as money is, as long as I'm here, I can always make more money, but once all the time has been spent, I can make or buy more time. 

Gone is gone. We know spirit lives on but the body definitely has an expiration date. When I first got out, after doing a decade and a week in the non-justice system for a crime I didn't commit (I have seen no justice system, only a financial one, thus still waiting for exoneration that's nowhere in sight.) 

I knew that in order for me to move forward in my life, mentally and emotionally as well as physically that it was important for me to not dwell on the past or better yet make sure that I  look at it with the right perspective. I knew early on that if I walked around here with a sour ass "life sucks cause I just got outta prison after doing a 10 year bid for something I didn't even do" attitude that it wouldn't get me anywhere and actually do the opposite internally stunting my growth. 

In other words, I was honest with myself and acknowledged the hurt, frustration,  confusion, and other emotions I felt towards being wrongfully accused and lock up and having that time out my life just taken from me but I also noted within my self that if I focused on it to much that I'd stay stuck in the past and miss the opportunity to fully experience my present freedom. 

As I said before, I knew I was extremely selfish in some areas, this being one them but now I know "why". Time was taken from me. I was innocently Taken like the movie and powerless to do anything about it. There's a lot going on out here and I'm trying to filter and defend myself against all the perceived threats to my time. I'll fight viciously like a starving animal you trying to take the last scrap from when it  comes to my time. I ain't saying I'm right for being selfish like that but having a better understanding of the reason "why" I'm extremely selfish/stingy with my time helps me have a little more patience with my self process and makes it a little easier for me not to hate myself for being an asshole about it when necessary. 

Even the smallest of things that may only require a few seconds, minutes, hours can be viewed as threats to my time. Things, people, even me myself, all at times appear to me as something trying to steal my time by putting me back in prison in some way, shape, or form. So I have to protect myself from small meaningless 5 minute conversations that will eventually add up to hours and those hours multiply into the loss of days. I'm fighting for my freedom.

Rizm:

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Raising Rizm Presents "Cooking with Rizm" Episode 1

Raising Rizm- N Rage Hair Color- Neon Red Review

I decided to post this video of my hair process.  I go through a lot to get the best red for my hair.  The issues I usually have is getting the right color that I want.  When I'm on stage I need a bright red to really stand out.  My first couple of times dyeing my hair red I went to a salon.  Since I'm always on the go traveling and going back and forth I need a way to touch up my hair color when needed.

I'm trying this N Rage Hair Dye color to see if this is something I can use in between my salon visits.  Of course I started off with bleaching my hair to strip it of the previous color and get a blank canvas.  Next was applying the color which was pretty simple.  N Rage offers a very simple application process.

I have to give props to Tranese Brookins for applying the color and handling the bleaching process.  She's a hair stylist and MUA. Check her out here.

Although I don't too much care for having to take the time to get my hair done I appreciate the people around me and how we always make it fun and just have a great time.

I hope you enjoy this video.

Rizm

Raising Rizm Ep. 5- My son's 1st Christmas

My son's first Christmas did not turn out how I expected it.  Me and his mom ended up broke and trying to pay rent.  I can honestly say that other than being in prison this could have been one of the worst Christmas'.  Like I said we didn't have any money to buy the kids presents.  On top of that we were trying very hard to get the rent paid for that month.  We honestly couldn't even think about presents because bills weighed so heavily on our minds.



The day before Christmas my son's mother made a decision to not worry about the bills but just for that day and Christmas just try to enjoy being with family and friends.  I finally decided to jump on board Christmas day. It ended up being an awesome day even though it wasn't how we planned it to be.



I hope you enjoy this video and the lesson I learned about what Christmas is all about.



I took this video from a larger video with my sons mother.  While shooting a Ca-Rizma video we thought this was a good "Raising Rizm" moment.  I hope you enjoy.  Don't forget to like, comment and share.



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Ca -Rizma "count the cost"

Happy New Year!!!

Happy New Year Everyone. I wasn't going to get on here because I know how God has personally been dealing with me, but I really didn't have or know what to say even though I felt I should given the position I'm blessed with to minister or mentor at times when God chooses to use me. Notice I said when "God" chooses to. But does anybody else feel that constant pressure of having to always know what to say, having to always have an answer, always be on point and have it together? So I rather not say anything, cause I can make it sound good if you know what I mean, but if you know me you know I ain't the one for all the fakeness. So I got back to basics and simply prayed Father God in the name of Jesus, I pray for everyone listening to me that they go into this New Year allowing YOU to lead the way. Make their path straight and clear before. Let us not be lead by our own mind/understanding, but trust You with our whole heart, cause we may have our little plans(who can match the imagination of how big His plan is for our life?),but You got the best plan going. Make it so that we don't need a plan B, C,D, none of that, all we need is You! And with Your plan you offer peace, which is so priceless now days. Keep us in remembrance that You are our all purpose answer for everything. Help us remember that you got us. You won't fail us. When everything and everyone else fails, even when we have failed ourselves, like I have time after time, You won't fail us. We bring You in remembrance of your word saying not that You make all things work for those who get it all right, cross every T and dot every I, and make perfect decisions all the time, but Your word says You make all things (everything seems to fall in the category of all, doesn't it?) work for the good of those who love You the called according to His purpose. Thank You for Your grace and mercy which we desperately need and help us to show that same mercy to others. Speaking of purpose, help us to love You more with our hearts and less with our mouths, and show it to others, our neighbor's, everyone, including those that we may feel don't deserve it, cause we don't always either. Remind us that Love is an action word and we are the vehicles You ride around in to make Your deliveries . It's not passive, it's aggressive. Keep us focused on You,cause if we do that keep our eyes on you we can walk on water, and if we can walk on water we can do anything. In Jesus name I pray. Amen. The church is where God lives, so its not the building, but the people are the church. Let the church say, Amen. Even something as simple as this, God provides manna from day to day. May this year be the best year of your life and let every year after be better than the one before. Peace and God bless. ‪#‎officialrizm‬ ‪#‎realrizm‬ ‪#‎rizmredtearz‬ ‪#‎rizmmusic‬‪#‎raisingrizm‬
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BIGGER THAN TREY